A Prayer In Time
by mandrake-o
Summary: To get Dean and Cas out of Purgatory, Sam and Gabriel must first go on a glorified scavenger hunt. Kevin goes along for some of the ride. Gen.


**A Prayer In Time  
**

**Author's Note: **This was originally posted on LiveJournal in response to a prompt left by antrazi at the spn-bigpretzel community.

x X X x

_THEN_

"Gabriel? I don't know any standard prayers to you and fuck if I'm going to go look one up so I just hope you're listening because I don't have time for a summoning ritual.

"You don't know me yet, but you will because unlike the bunch of people who pray and don't believe even in you, I'm from the future. I'm probably talking to myself but if you are listening, there are a few things you'll probably want to know. Starting with the big one: You die in 2010. Lucifer kills you, so you might want to avoid that if at all possible. And if you do manage that, I'm not sure if you remember your little brother Castiel, but it would help the entire planet if you could stop him from opening the gate to Purgatory and letting everything out. I'm not holding out much hope for that one, since I've been to the past often enough to know that it's not going to change.

"And, um..." He lowered his voice. "I know it's a long shot and it's not like we were ever really friends, or anything, but I've lost a lot of friends lately and I never had many to begin with. So if we do one day meet again, I promise I won't try to kill you as long as you don't try to kill me.

"That's it, I guess. But if I'm still here tomorrow, maybe you could help me get back to my time? I figure that's the least you could do for me warning you about your death and you still owe me for all the times you killed me. Uh, amen?"

The trickster formerly known as Gabriel watched as the man put his fedora back on his head, checked his weapon and left the room. It was something to think about, but there was a lot of time between now and 2010.

x x x

_NOW_

Gabriel took a deep breath and steeled himself. He could do this. He flew straight to Rufus' cabin and landed right behind Sam Winchester.

"Hey there Sammy," he said.

Sam spun around, his Taurus out before he registered exactly who was standing in front of him. When he saw who it was, he pulled the trigger and fired.

Gabriel didn't flinch, but the bullets were transformed into pieces of chocolate on their journey over and he skilfully plucked them from the sky and popped them into his mouth. "Mmm," he said.

"Gabriel?" said Sam, unwilling to believe it. But who else but the faux Trickster would be able to get inside the cabin and turn bullets into chocolate.

"The one and only."

"You're dead."

"No, I'm not, actually. Thanks to your brother."

"Dean? What does Dean have to do with this? Did you see him in Purgatory?"

"Purgatory?" said Gabriel. "I've never been. I hadn't realised Dean had, either."

"Don't make it sound like it's a vacation," said Sam. "Do you know how many monsters we've killed? And it's been weeks and Dean's probably dead by now, so don't. Just don't."

"Hold up, bucko," said Gabriel. "Dean's in Purgatory?"

"Where the fuck have you been?" Sam suddenly seemed twice as large and though Gabriel could still kill him with little more than a thought, it was a little intimidating. But Gabriel was an archangel so he didn't actually waver.

"Castiel made a mess of Heaven," said Gabriel. "I've been cleaning it up." So many brothers lost, and no way for Gabriel to stop it. Dean had really underestimated the situation when he'd prayed to Gabriel. "Do you know how hard it is to teach an angel to use a cell phone?"

"Back up," said Sam, sitting down. Gabriel took his lead and conjured a plush couch for himself. He wouldn't be surprised if rats were living in the one Sam was sitting on. "Start from the beginning. How are you not dead?"

"I faked my death," he said. "I knew it was coming because your brother warned me back in 1944."

"1944?" said Sam. "But that was months ago!"

"Even _I_can't kill a Leviathan," said Gabriel.

"No, but it's probably easier for you to cut one's head off, then toss it to the other side of the universe."

"Point," said Gabriel. "But like I said, I've been looking after my brothers."

"Meanwhile mine's in Purgatory with our crazy angel friend. Don't even get me started on the fucking demons."

"Gabriel to the rescue," said Gabriel. "Since I kind of owe him for the still being alive thing."

"And how exactly are you going to help?" asked Sam. "I've looked everywhere and asked everyone I know."

"Archangel, remember?"

Sam had been too caught up in the idea that Gabriel could have shown up earlier, to pay attention to what he'd been saying. His brain was only just catching up with his ears. "Did you say something about teaching an angel to use a cell phone?"

"I put a garrison into witness protection," said Gabriel. "They're surprisingly terrible at blending in."

Sam snorted.

Gabriel went on, trying to defuse the tension in the room, and in Sam. If he was honest, he would admit that he could have shown up earlier, but he was naturally concerned with the reception he was going to receive.

"Inias says hello. He probably would have called, but knowing all the languages in the world can't help him with a touchscreen."

"Inias? I thought he was dead."

"Archangel," said Gabriel. "I got there when Kevin was threatened and got the angels the hell out of there."

"And what about Kevin? You just left him with the Leviathans?"

"They weren't going to kill him. He's still alive, isn't he?" Gabriel hadn't heard any spiritual triggers go off.

"He's just a kid and Crowley's got him."

"Oh," said Gabriel. "I can fix that." He snapped out and was back with one Keeper of the Word before anyone human knew what had happened.

"Whoa," said Kevin, falling backward onto the chaise Gabriel conjured for him.

"Here," said Gabriel, handing over an ice cream sundae with hot fudge sauce, extra nuts and a spoon.

Kevin took it, but stared wide-eyed at Gabriel, then at Sam.

"Hey Kevin," said Sam. "That's Gabriel. We thought he was dead."

Kevin just shook his head and stuck his spoon into the sundae. "There is something wrong with this world. I'm in advanced placement, I'm not supposed to find suddenly appearing in a cabin in Montana comforting."

"Blame Gabriel," said Sam. "He's supposed to be your guardian angel."

"Wha-?" Kevin stared.

"Guilty," said Gabriel. "To be fair, I did save all your angel friends."

"What about my mom?" asked Kevin.

Gabriel winced. He hadn't kept track of the woman. There were too many things going on in his life. Sam saw his face and winced. It didn't take all of Kevin's genius to figure out that it was a bad thing.

"She's in Heaven and the Leviathans haven't figured out how to get there yet?" Gabriel attempted to soothe Kevin. He increased the size of Kevin's sundae.

"That's just great," said Kevin, he set the sundae down on the coffee table. "I'll be in the sex torture dungeon if you need me."

Gabriel's eyes lit up. "There's a sex torture dungeon?"

Sam looked at his gun, as though contemplating shooting Gabriel again.

When Kevin was gone, Sam said, "You could have handled that better, you know."

"Heaven's not so bad," he said.

"Says the guy who ran away millennia ago."

"I'm trying," said Gabriel. "I found your prophet. That's one problem solved."

There was a loud crash in the basement downstairs.

Sam got up. "He's going to kill himself."

"Sit down," said Gabriel. "He's fine. I'd know if he was in danger."

Sam sat. "Dean," he said. "You owe him."

"I do," said Gabriel. "I guess we'd better get started." He stood up and the extra couches disappeared. Gabriel picked up Kevin's sundae and ate it with inhuman speed before vanishing the glass dish that had held it. Sam hadn't moved an inch. "Get with the program, Sammy. Do you want to rescue your brother or not?"

"Wait," said Sam. "Where are we going?"

"I know a guy," said Gabriel.

"You know a guy?"

"God of Thresholds," said Gabriel with a smirk.

Sam frowned as he processed that. "And what you just ask this guy to open the door to Purgatory and he'll do it?"

"We're old friends," said Gabriel.

"Which one?" asked Sam.

"Which one what?"

"What's your friend's name?"

"Portunes."

"Never heard of him," said Sam. "Are you sure he still exists?"

"There used to be a lot of liminal deities," said Gabriel. "He's the only one left. That smidge of relief you feel when you cross a threshold counts as a prayer to him. Stubbed toes count as sacrifices."

"So he's still pretty powerful," said Sam.

"Yes."

"And he's not going to kill us on sight?"

"Of course not," said Gabriel.

"Because I kind of get the feeling this is like in the second Harry Potter book when Ron and Harry meet Aragog."

"Never read it," said Gabriel.

"Right," said Sam. But there wasn't anything Sam wouldn't do to rescue his brother from somewhere, so to Portunes he would go.

"Kevin," called Sam. "We're about to go see a pagan god and take a trip to Purgatory. We're probably not coming back if it's been more than a week."

"I'll be here," called Kevin. There was another crash and a clank. The kid really was remarkably well-adjusted.

x x x

Portunes liked buildings full of doors and there were a fair few of those in the world, so it was a few false leads before Gabriel finally located him.

Sam stared up at the old, mostly abandoned building. "Where are we?" he asked.

"Indonesia," said Gabriel. "This is Lawang Sewu. A thousand doors."

"And I suppose Portunes is hiding behind one of them?"

Gabriel grinned.

Sam shook his head. Needle in a hay stack.

Lawang Sewu was actually a complex of a few buildings. Sam could appreciate that they had once been attractive buildings, but now they were full of bats and cobwebs, and from the way the hair on the back of his neck stood up, more than a few spirits. Not to mention that if Gabriel was right Lawang Sewu also housed one, hopefully friendly, pagan god.

There were a lot of doors. Each room seemed to have at least four. At least six if you counted some that looked like they were really floor-length windows. And he and Gabriel were walking through every single one of them. Sam was starting to get dizzy with the sheer number and he lost count before they made their way through the first building.

Portunes appeared just when Sam had given up on the idea of him, certain that this was just another one of Gabriel's tricks.

"I told you I never wanted to see you again," he said in a strangely accented voice. It surprised Sam, so used to hearing only bats, footsteps and the persistent creak of doors.

"Portly," said Gabriel with a grin. "How are you man? It's good to see you."

"Don't call me that."

Sam felt a sudden kinship with this vaguely humanoid god. "I thought you said you were friends."

Gabriel shrugged. "It's not like you believed me."

"Go away," said Portunes. And yet another door appeared. Sam did not want to know what lay on the other side of that one.

"We need your help," said Sam. "Scratch that. _I _need your help. This guy's just a means to an end."

"Hey!" protested Gabriel. Sam and Portunes both ignored him.

"I need you to open the door to Purgatory for me."

Portunes frowned. "There's been a lot of that happening recently," he said.

"I don't know you," said Sam. "And I don't know what you want or why you'd help me, but my brother is in there and I need to get him out."

"Oh," said Portunes.

"Oh?" repeated Sam.

"You're a Winchester." He looked at Gabriel. "You're hanging out with a Winchester?"

"His brother may or may not have saved my life," said Gabriel. "This one's just fun to tease."

Sam glowered. "Purgatory. Open it. I'll do pretty much anything you want in return."

"All right, fine," said Portunes with a theatrical sigh. Sam would never have expected anything less from a friend of Gabriel's. "But I can't just open it. I'm going to need a few things first."

"Wait, what?" said Sam. "You're not going to tell me what you want me to do?"

"A favour from a Winchester is going to come in handy one of these days," said Portunes. "I think I'll hold onto it."

Sam couldn't bring himself to care anymore. "What do you need?"

Portunes smiled. "Got a pen?"

Sam didn't, actually, since he hadn't packed a bag before hopping on the archangel express. Sam glared at Gabriel, who conjured him a piece of parchment and a quill. To spite him, Sam calmly said nothing. He once went to a calligraphy class with Jess. He could write with a quill.

The first few things were bog standard things that any hunter worth his salt would have. (Admittedly, salt was worth a lot to a hunter.) Silver knife. Cat's eye shells. Lamb's blood. Bird bones. A few more got a raised eyebrow, but Sam could deal. A pentagonal shard from a mirror. A black cat bone. (Not a bone from a black cat, but a black cat-bone.) Blood of a Reaper. Snowdrop plucked at midnight. Hair of the hellhound. But some, Sam was certain weren't required at all. Eye of Newt. Dragon heartstring. (Portunes must have read Harry Potter even if Gabriel hadn't.) Tears of a clown. Gold that was once lead. Air Force 1s. A Continuum Transfunctioner. The Green Lantern's lantern. The Sankara Stones.

"Did you just say MacGuffin?" Sam asked, looking up from his shopping list.

"No," said Portunes. "I said McMuffin. From McDonald's. A pork sausage one. You know they make them with chicken here?"

Sam frowned. But if the dude wanted a McMuffin, Sam was only thankful he didn't have to do anything worse. "Is that all?"

"Yes," said Portunes. "I think that will be enough to open the door to Purgatory."

"Awesome," said Sam without feeling. He turned to Gabriel. "Let's go."

x x x

Gabriel took Sam back to Rufus' cabin so he could pick up the first few items he already had. Sam went downstairs to collect a silver knife. Kevin was curled up asleep on the floor. Sam knew that feeling. But he had a list now, and he could finally help his brother. Sam went back upstairs and double-checked that there was food in the fridge. There was a loaf of bread in the freezer and a jar of mayonnaise in the fridge itself.

It was dawn in Montana, so Sam figured they might as well hit McDonald's now and bring back something for Kevin. Hotcakes, maybe. Kevin seemed like a hotcakes kind of guy.

Sam hadn't driven the Impala since he'd gotten it back to Montana, but Dean's baby was made for driving and if Dean was going to be back soon, he'd want to know she'd been taken care of. And you couldn't take the archangel express through a drive thru.

x x x

Sam had been on a scavenger hunt once at Stanford. One of the guys in the dorm had organised it for their floor, and Sam ended up working with his roommate. The guy had a grasp on the mechanics of the normal world and Sam was used to being the one scouring the books for the weird ritual ingredients and they finished hours before second place. But for all that Sam's research skills had helped, finding things for a ritual had never seemed so much like a scavenger hunt before Sam met Portunes.

It turned out that Kevin was a hotcakes kind of guy. He sat and ate them as he watched Sam try to smash mirrors into pentagonal pieces, seemingly unworried by the idea of ingesting stray glass. Sam had about fifty-six years worth of bad luck at that point.

"Does it actually have to be a regular pentagon?" Kevin asked. He could see a few lying around that had five uneven sides.

Sam consulted his list. "Shit," he said. "It doesn't." He selected the largest shard, wrapped it in a bandanna and put it into the bag with his silver knife, cat's eye shells, lamb's blood, bird bones and Sausage and Egg McMuffin.

Next up was a black cat bone. Sam had a few bones from black cats. He didn't like to think about how he'd gotten them. None of them were black. "Do you think you can turn them black?" Sam asked Gabriel.

"Conjuring ingredients never works the same as collecting them," said Gabriel. "But I guess I could encourage some bacteria to grow on them."

"Are you sure they aren't meant to come from a cat with black bone disease?" asked Kevin.

"Black bone disease?"

"I don't even know if cats can get it."

"The kid makes a good point, though," said Gabriel.

Suddenly there was a cat sitting on the table beside Kevin's hotcakes. Kevin moved his food away from the cat, putting up his arm to block it while he finished the last bites. The cat was dark grey and really looked pitiful.

"One cat with black bones," said Gabriel.

"Are you going to kill that?" Kevin asked. "I'm eating here."

"Not yet," said Gabriel. "It's not midnight yet. Too early to boil it."

"Are you for real?" asked Kevin. He shook his head. "I'm going to stop asking questions."

"Next is the blood of a Reaper," said Sam. "I had no idea they even bled."

"Ready to die?" Gabriel asked Sam.

"Can't you do it?" asked Sam. "Without me dying?"

Kevin stood up and tossed his trash. "I'm going back to the sex torture dungeon. Wake me up when everyone's dead."

"I can't say I'm on particularly good terms with any Reaper," said Gabriel.

"What about harnessing one?"

"How long did you want to wait before you rescued Dean?"

Sam sighed and went to lie down on the couch. "You'd better bring me back to life. Because if I end up in Heaven without Dean, I'm giving you Hell."

"What if you end up in Hell?" asked Gabriel.

"I'll figure out how to bring it to you," said Sam.

"Oh Sammy," said Gabriel. "I'm starting to think you don't trust me."

"The only reason why I'm trusting you right now," said Sam. "Is because you owe Dean. And I've seen just how capable you are of resurrections a hundred times over."

"No need for flattery," said Gabriel. "I'll do it."

Sam didn't feel it when Gabriel died. The next thing he knew he had to deal with an annoyed Reaper who refused to give him his blood. It was only with the threat of leashing him that the Reaper finally agreed. And in the back of his head all the while, Sam had a nagging feeling that he was being led on a wild goose chase. And that he'd have a better chance of catching a wild goose than finding everything on the list.

When Gabriel brought Sam back to life, it was lunchtime and Sam was starving. Something about being dead always made him hungry. Thankfully Gabriel seemed to realise this and Sam was biting into a Hershey's bar before he registered that he was hungry. "What's next?" he asked. He looked at the empty wrapper in his hand. "Can I have another candy bar?"

"Snowdrop plucked at midnight," said Gabriel.

As Sam chewed on his candy bar, something occurred to him. He grabbed his laptop and Googled it. "It's the wrong season for snowdrops," said Sam. "On the other hand, if we do find one on the other side of the planet it will probably be midnight."

"Never fear, Gabriel is here," said Gabriel.

x x x

It was nighttime in the blink of an eye and they were in someone's greenhouse. Sam recognised the snowdrops in a row of pots in front of him.

"Would you like to do the honours?"

"How do I know when it's exactly midnight?" Sam asked.

"When they open," said Gabriel.

"What?" said Sam. Flowers didn't open at night, there wasn't enough light.

And yet, it wasn't more than ten seconds before the blooms started to expand.

"Now Sam," said Gabriel, when the one nearest was at its most open.

Sam reached out and pinched a flower at its stem. As soon as it broke away from the rest of the plant, the flowers began closing again. "That was weird."

x x x

"Hair of the hellhound?" Sam read, once they were back in Montana. "That's a joke, right?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Gabriel said. He was lounging on a conjured chaise, tossing M&Ms up into the air and catching them his mouth.

"I won't be able to see a hellhound. There's no way I can grab one of its hairs."

"I suppose it's Gabriel to the rescue again."

"Well you are the archangel. I'm just a lowly human."

Gabriel tilted his head up to look at Sam. "I suppose lowly means close to the sky, huh?"

Sam rolled his eyes. "You can look like anything you want and yet you choose that guy."

Gabriel grinned. "Just lucky, I guess."

"Hair of the hellhound," said Sam. "Go fetch."

Gabriel barked once and disappeared. He came back with an invisible something pinched between his fingers.

Sam eyed it suspiciously. "You'd better not be having me on."

Gabriel stuck it right in front of Sam's face. "Smell it," he said.

Sam's nose crinkled automatically as he got a whiff. Brimstone and wet dog. Lovely.

x x x

Gabriel smirked at the bitchface Sam was making at the newt Gabriel had brought him.

"Tick tock, Sammy," said Gabriel. "You only need one eye and that little fellow's got two."

"I can't," said Sam.

"I suppose you want your brother to die in Purgatory, then?"

"It's just so..." Sam gestured at the amphibian helplessly.

Kevin set down the book he was reading and heaved a sigh. "And you've got no qualms about chopping off a Leviathan's head."

"They're evil and they eat people," said Sam. "What did a newt ever do to Portunes?"

"It's already dead," said Kevin.

"And I feel really bad about that."

Kevin took the scalpel from Sam's hand and neatly extracted both eyeballs with finesse. "You're welcome," he said, going back to his book.

Gabriel did like that kid.

x x x

"There is no way dragon heartstring is a real thing," said Sam. "Heartstrings are metaphorical."

Kevin looked up from his book. "Dragons are real?" When he saw Gabriel open his mouth, Kevin looked back down at his book. "Don't ask questions, Kevin."

"Metaphorical doesn't mean non-existent," said Gabriel.

"Fine," said Sam. "How are they physical?"

"Dragons are some of the oldest creatures on this planet," said Gabriel. "Eve the All-Mother gave birth to them. And like mammalian births, there was a cord connecting her to her children."

"So you're saying that a dragon heartstring is actually an umbilical cord."

"That's why they call you the smart one."

"And there are some of these still around?"

"Where there's a will, there's a way," said Gabriel.

Sam eyed the archangel. "You're not going to help me with this one, are you?"

"I can't just look everywhere for you," said Gabriel. "You've got to narrow it down."

Sam sighed and booted up his laptop. "What does it look like?"

"Like an umbilical cord," said Gabriel.

It took Sam the rest of the night to locate anything resembling a dragon heartstring. In the meantime Gabriel popped out for Air Force 1s (red and black to match Portunes' ears) and the Green Lantern's lantern (actually just a movie prop that Sam had zero qualms about Gabriel stealing). At midnight, Gabriel sacrificed the cat for its bones while Kevin observed like a sorcerer's apprentice. Watching him, Gabriel also conjured the apparatus that Kevin would need to transform lead into gold. Sam worried that he might accidentally cause a nuclear explosion but it turned out the kid really was some kind of genius.

"It looks like one might be in the British Museum's collection," said Sam. "Not on display."

"How do you know that?" asked Kevin, before slapping a hand over his mouth. "I should just go home."

"Unfortunately, demons are probably still looking for you," said Sam.

"I may be able to help you out," said Gabriel. "But one thing at a time."

"Purgatory beats sex dungeon," said Kevin.

"You'll have to tell me that story one day," said Gabriel. He turned to Sam. "Ready to rob the British?"

x x x

The fossilised dragon heartstring went into the bag with everything else.

"Bet you're going to love this one, Sammy," said Gabriel who was looking down at the list.

"How do you even know that?" asked Sam. "And no, I'm not going to enjoy it. You can take Kevin with you."

"No thanks," said Kevin.

"You don't even know what's next on the list," said Sam.

"I know better than to ask questions," said Kevin.

"Tears of a clown," said Gabriel.

"I'm in," said Kevin, a vicious spark of something lighting in his eyes.

"What?" Sam was taken aback.

"Clowns are evil," he said.

Gabriel laughed. "That's the spirit. Sammy-boy?"

"No," said Sam. "End of discussion. I haven't slept in over twenty-four hours. I'd really much rather do that."

"Suit yourself," said Gabriel. "Little Kev and I are going to make a clown cry."

"Don't call me that!"

And then they were gone.

x x x

Sam didn't end up sleeping while Gabriel and Kevin were gone. The last two items on the list were things that Sam didn't think existed outside of movies. Oh sure there was lore on the Sankara Stones- they hadn't been entirely invented for _Temple of Doom_- but that wasn't what they were called and they certainly didn't do what Indy said they did. And then there was the Continuum Transfunctioner. It boggled Sam's mind to think that anyone who worked on _Dude, Where's My Car?_was in any way in the know with regard to the supernatural.

Kevin and Gabriel came back when Sam had just nodded off on his keyboard. He jolted awake. Neither Kevin nor Gabriel were covered in glitter. Sam thought that was just a little unfair. He didn't say it out loud, but got the feeling Gabriel was reading his mind.

Kevin set a test tube filled with clear liquid on the table before going to bed for the rest of the night. Tears of a clown looked like regular tears. Go figure.

"What the fuck's a continuum transfunctioner?" Sam asked Gabriel.

The archangel just laughed. That was not comforting. "Doesn't exist," he said.

"But it's on the list," said Sam, starting to freak out. If he couldn't get everything on the list, existent or not, how was he going to get Dean out of Purgatory?

"He wants to know that you've watched the movie," said Gabriel. "It's a test."

"Should we get a Rubik's Cube?"

"You have seen it," said Gabriel.

"Have you met my brother?"

"Once or twice."

"And then you killed him a few hundred times so nothing should surprise you," said Sam. "So, a Rubik's Cube. Then what about the Sankara Stones?"

"Once again you've forgotten who you're talking to," said Gabriel.

"And who would that be?"

"Loki."

"You met Shiva?"

"Met, tormented. Same difference."

"Please tell me we can go drop off Portunes' bag of goodies in the next hour."

"I know you miss your brother but has anyone ever told you how unhealthily attached you are?"

Sam loomed and frowned. "Gabriel."

"Nearest stones are in Nantucket."

"You're fucking with me."

"I am honest to Dad serious." Gabriel undermined the believability of his statement with an eyebrow waggle that a human wouldn't be capable of.

"I miss my brother," Sam whined. "I even miss Crazy Cas. And now I have a craving for honey. And I really need to sleep because nothing makes sense anymore. But I can't sleep because we're so damn close and what if it's right now that Dean dies? What if we're two seconds too late. We have to go now, Gabriel. Let's go. Rubik's Cube, Nantucket, then Indonesia, then Purgatory. No stopovers."

"Just call me Jeannie because your wish is my command."

x x x

Portunes didn't even look inside the bag. "Took you long enough," he said. He nodded at one of the identical doors in the room. "That's the one you want."

"That's it?" said Sam. He'd gotten the feeling they were being given the run-around, but Portunes could have at least pretended that the things in the bag meant something to him.

Portunes fished out the day-old McMuffin. He ate half of it in one bite, wrapper and all. "That's it."

"And if we open the door is anything else going to come out?"

"Just your brother," said Portunes. "It's my door. I control who passes."

"Like a troll."

"You know what they say about biting the hand that feeds you."

"Technically," said Sam, "I just fed you."

"Go on before I change my mind."

"A friend of ours is in Purgatory with Dean. Got sucked through at the same time."

Portunes huffed. "All right, fine. He can come through, too." Portunes dipped his hand into the bag and came out with the small lump of gold. (Kevin had kept half of it as a souvenir.) He squeezed it like a stress ball and the metal reacted like one.

Sam opened the door to Purgatory. He took a deep breath, about to walk through. But he didn't need to. In that second, Dean walked right out with a smile on his face, followed by Cas (still in his hospital pyjamas), and looking no worse for wear. Sam, having not slept at all in the last forty-eight hours, and having slept little in the month that Dean had been missing, was certain he did not look or smell fresh as a daisy.

Sam punched Dean in the arm.

"Ow," said Dean, rubbing his arm. "What? No hug?"

"I've been worrying my ass off for a month and you're not even injured."

"Well no," said Dean. "Why would I be?"

"You were in Purgatory!"

"Yeah but it's Purgatory," said Dean. "Nothing changes. You go in fine, you come out fine. And it's only been a couple hours. I haven't even had time to get bored yet."

Cas is busy staring out the nearest window. "There aren't many bees here."

"No there are not, little bro," said Gabriel, putting a hand on his shoulder.

Dean stared at Gabriel, then at Sam. "What did you do?"

"Nothing," said Sam. "This was all you."

Gabriel took the opportunity to engulf Dean in a hug, despite their difference in stature. "My hero," he said.

Sam smugly noted that Dean was actually blushing as he made ineffective efforts at dislodging the archangel.

"Your exit is thataway," said Portunes, indicating one of the identical doors in the room. "Let the door hit you on the way out."

"Who are you?" Dean asked with eyes narrowed.

"Friend of mine," said Gabriel, pushing Dean toward the door. Dean went willingly, eager to get away from any friend of Gabriel's.

"Come on, Cas," said Sam, turning to the angel. "Let's go home."

x X X x

**A/N:** Yes, I did look up the Indonesian McDonald's menu. I had to click all the tabs before I found the one for breakfast. I hadn't realised my Indo was so rusty. But I still know that "ayam" means chicken. (And now you do, too.)


End file.
